It's getting closer

Wonderful life. Wonderful youth. You disappear too quickly. 
Today we had the student cap day, when all students is suppose to take their caps on. It is really getting closer now. Our graduation party that we planned for a year was over in an evening. We have six weeks left together. Six weeks. It is unbelieveble. I've never been so emotionally charged for anything as long as for the graduation, and never with such mixed feelings. Joy and excitement, sadness and anxiety. I can not even think about the student without getting a lump in my throat. Today, when the head teacher spoke and the choir sang in the auditorium, I sat with a lump in my throat, as usual, and told myself not to cry. But when I turned my head  to the left I saw Karin and crying, to the right cried Miranda. Even Elina bursted into tears. It was absolutely impossible to hold back. We sat there and cried, while we laughed at ourselves because we were crying among all the serious people around us. I think I speak for all of us when I say that we cry because life is so damn wonderful now, together. We've had a wonderful time these three years, and soon it will end.

I have never ever been so unaware of what awaits me in my life. I do not know if I will be studying next year, if I enter or not, or if I'm going to work or travel. I can not say with certainty what friends I will hang out with in six months, I do not even know what I will do this summer. I know nothing, which is scary for me. But I've realized that I must take things as they come, day by day. Spontaneous. These six weeks I have to enjoy, day by day, for they are disappearing and never coming back. There is no time for worries, thinking and analyzing. Sometimes you can't plan everything. It's called living in the moment. What's happening right now is what matters.
In the end everything will be just fine.


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